Having a relative in your life that has Alzheimer’s or dementia is beset with challenges. Both conditions lend themselves to frustrating behaviors on behalf of the patient. Often, the forgetfulness, moodiness and inability to complete simple tasks from one day to another can even be interpreted as willful or obstinate. And while we always want to approach our loved ones with compassion and understanding, these conditions often stretch our abilities to the limit. Likewise, for too few attorneys, immersion into the dementia related will contest mindset offers rare insight into the plight of their client or their client’s loved one.
Attorneys who handle will contests and trust contests can also benefit tremendously from the experience. To understand what a client or their loved one is actually going through could be extremely helpful to more effective preparation for a will contest or other probate litigation. Not to mention, gaining the firsthand “perspective” of the subject of the litigation. Success or failure in any endeavor can be steeped in perspective. For example, without a keen perspective of what was truly happening with the cognitive deficits, or lack thereof, of the person signing the will, how can you offer the best and most persuasive presentation to the jury? Or the judge?
The popular saying “Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes,” best explains the importance of empathy. Virtual dementia tours have popped up all over the country and have been set up to immerse caregivers into the patients’ world so they can glean a better, and firsthand, understanding of the many daily challenges. The tour, administered in person by a facilitator, begins with caregivers donning special goggles designed to simulate macular degeneration. They are then given restrictive plastic gloves and a few of their fingers are taped on each hand to mimic the effects of arthritis. Plastic spikes are placed in their shoes to create the “pins and needles” feeling of neuropathy that many patients experience. Finally, caregivers wear headphones playing a mixture of static-filled radio, garbled speaking and other jarring sounds. It is reported that many patients often experience constant “static” or “chatter.”
Once suited up, caregivers are given small, simple tasks to complete in a limited amount of time, such as folding laundry, cleaning a dinner table or pouring and drinking a glass of water. Participants soon discover that within this environment, even the simplest tasks become extremely challenging. It’s difficult to see clearly through the hazy glasses, one fumbles and drops things due to impaired hand coordination, each step emits pain and the constant chatter from the headphones makes it next to impossible to even remember the stated task. Upon completion, most recipients report exhaustion, frustration, pain and even the feeling that they are going insane.
The stark reality that participants are able to end the simulation after only a few minutes, while those they care for are enduring a life sentence of these challenges, is not lost on them. Herein lies the importance of undergoing a virtual dementia tour. The recipients are more aware and empathetic that the irritations they experience are nothing in comparison to what Alzheimer’s and dementia patients endure every waking moment.
Virtual dementia tours are plentiful throughout the San Antonio region, offered free of charge by many hospitals, elder care facilities and community centers. Simply google “virtual dementia tour, San Antonio, TX” to find one in your area.